The 1

“What’s your bike’s cc?” were the first few words I spoke to him. It was one way of bragging “I ride a gear bike too, you know?” and he understood. I didn’t listen to what he said for my mind was busy processing his image, side by side preparing the next few questions to ask. We worked for the same company and one fine morning, I saw him at the parking lot. My heart was jumping in joy for I was going to keep my bike next to his. Being pathetic at math, I couldn’t recollect his number plate. There was 8 and 6. But his image along with the bike got plastered inside my head. His strong jaw, always-2-day beard (classic Mallu style), his long legs and perfect ass; Ha, what more would I’ve asked for. Impeccable eye contact, slight lisp, loud laugh, light attitude and cute smile were the icing on this cake. Have I really found the one, I wondered. And the rounds began.

Marriage is every girl’s dream and nightmare. May be because it is so confusing, some girls start the selection process from childhood. As a firm believer of *Footwear and husband are the most difficult and important decisions for a girl*, I started with the guy I played *doctor-doctor* and *teacher-student* with. He lost points after he grew permanent teeth.  Also because I joined a cooler school where I met my childhood sweetheart. It lasted longer than I thought for the guy got cuter each year! I changed school again, thanks to the RAMAN gang. Everyday cycle rides were combined with Hanuman Chaalisa on the lips and a silent prayer to accidentally run into him. And I did, 8 years later, just to learn he had moved on to an high school sweetheart.

Every guy went through this rigorous evaluation process in my head which was more complicated than Google’s. There was just seeing, seriously seeing, just talking, friends, good friends and close friends. Or, it took a diversion from talking to flirting, going out, dating, relationship and serious relationship.

Generally, moms play a major role in this process. They read minds and voice their opinions out loud. You follow a guy with your eyeballs till your sight can reach and she knows. Even the slightest of the smiles you try to hide on hearing his name, leads to an hour long questioning. And by chance your opinions on the guy don’t match, hell breaks loose. Mine was no exception.

Yet, somehow, this guy slid through all the rounds with ease. Influencers (read: Parents) were convinced and the buck stopped with the RAMAN gang. “Machi, please marry him”, they said. And I am.

Except for the increase in the Malayalam accent in Tamil and English, one year has gone by without boredom and regrets. I really had found The 1.

Happy first year to me.

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Jigardhanda- Best served cold

“Machi it is good it seems d” was how it started. Friendship day meeting had Jigardhanda as one of the topic of discussion. It made me recollect all the retweets by Siddharth on my wall. To justify the hype, RAMAN gang made the plan. As usual, 2/5 were busy and I, after an exhausting previous day needed a break. There were more retweets. Impossible to resist the pressure, I made a call to Inox, Virugambakkam.

I rushed from work and two VIPs (abbreviation of the recent Dhanush movie) reached much before. We had top row seats and felt blessed. Siddharth’s half shaven head appeared. None of us had any expectations from the movie. Camera turned to his face. We showed no reaction. Popcorn and Pepsi came by and so did the villain.

That was the first time after long, the hand to mouth coordination missed. Popcorn lost its taste. All of us fell for the well bearded Simha. (Ha, How ideally named!) And the hooting began. Demonstrations of his ruthlessness proceeded to the interval and the 3 of us looked at each other with an “Aiyo, NO” look on our faces. We didn’t need more popcorn. We wanted the movie to resume, and it did.

Except for flicking ideas from Lakshmi Menon to punish our boyfriends, we had no other discussions. We didn’t realise the length of the movie till our phones started ringing one after the other. All our parents informed us of the heavy rain outside, we didn’t care. They called again to ask if we were even coming home, we wanted to throw our phones away. And the movie came to an end. It was surprising to see there were no bloopers playing along with credits. May be our moms jinxed it, I thought.

“Write about it d, with your English knowledge” she said from behind, while I was riding the bike in the rain. Good movie, rain and mom’s yelling is a terrific combo. Pissed off moms are more dangerous than ruthless Simhas. They don’t have knives and cycle chains but words and sharp voices. Yet, RAMAN plans still continue..

When is *Kadhai, Thiraikadhai, Vasanam, Eyakkam* releasing?